Do we see The Christian Science Monitor. Of course not, Tonight is Smut Night.
We'll take a look at morning papers after the break.
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(ROOSTER CROWING)
BROWN: All right. I am so into this. Time to check the morning papers from around the country and around the world. They're a mess today.There's no clear lead anywhere in the world, OK? So we'll start with a couple of tabloids, Australian tabloids. Why not? Because I just thought this story was unbelievably dumb. I don't mean the story, the guy. "Mate, I'll Do it Again." This is the story of the crocodile or the alligator -- I never understood the difference anyway -- crocodile guy who's messing with the crocodile while he's holding his baby. He's doing like a Michael Jackson thing over the balcony. And he says, yes, I'll do it again. They put that all-important Britney Spears story on the front page, the one day -- but they didn't do it as well as "The Daily Telegraph." They've got the whole picture. "Britney Married One Day, Divorcing the Next." Look at that happy couple, and yet they're divorcing. What do you make of that? On to the domestic papers. They can't hold a candle to that, can they?
"The Richmond Times-Dispatch."
"The Cincinnati Enquirer."
"Philadelphia Inquirer"
"The Detroit News."
"The Boston Herald"
"The Chicago Sun-Times."